August 2009
1 post
I'll Have A Dog Mac With Fries, Please
downwitthesouth: Someday you will understand, and it will be a significant step on your path to adulthood. When did understanding animal rites determine your path to adulthood? how stupid is that the man was fighting dogs dogs!! Americans want to act like this is so wrong fighting dogs when you got kids dying in araq now thats wrong putting all this violence and nudity on t.v. and magazines on...
July 2009
10 posts
The Ballad of Zach and Stacie, Part 5
Editor’s note: This is the final installment of a five-part serial chronicling a pair of star-crossed, punctutation-eschewing lovers, who found each other on a Prince message board, and never looked back.
Lentz_stacie_14: im here baby Zach: hey baby i missed u Lentz_stacie_14: i missed u but u do want u to get me pregnant iwll u please baby Zach: idk wat woul ur mom think Lentz_stacie_14: idk...
The Ballad of Zach and Stacie, Part 4
Editor’s note: This is installment four of a five-part serial chronicling a pair of star-crossed, punctutation-eschewing lovers, who found each other on a Prince message board, and never looked back.
Zach: were u at baby Lentz_stacie_14: really i love u u can ask me now Zach: idk baby i love u and all but we gotta meet first Lentz_stacie_14: why so u can see me and say u dont love me Zach: naw...
The Ballad of Zach and Stacie, Part 3
Editor’s note: This is installment three of a five-part serial chronicling a pair of star-crossed, punctutation-eschewing lovers, who found each other on a Prince message board, and never looked back.
Lentz_stacie_14: babe its not funny i wanna be married to u iwant kids wit u Zach: i wish i wouldnt have dona all the things i have done in my past but i wish i could go back and change them cuz i...
The Ballad of Zach and Stacie, Part 2
Editor’s note: This is installment two of a five-part serial chronicling a pair of star-crossed, punctutation-eschewing lovers, who found each other on a Prince message board, and never looked back.
Zach: aw rite do u drink or smoke Zach: i want all 3 my hands on u rite now lolol Lentz_stacie_14: i do both an 1 is a leg Zach: yea my middle leg lol wat u smoke Lentz_stacie_14: kool i dont do pot...
The Ballad of Zach and Stacie, Part 1
Editor’s note: This is installment one of a five-part serial chronicling a pair of star-crossed, punctutation-eschewing lovers, who found each other on a Prince message board, and never looked back.
Zach: u here stacie. Lentz_stacie_14: yeah im here why did u wanna go here Zach: hey wat is ur myspace psswd so i can add u to my top friends i swear i wont fu*k anyhing up baby u can change it...
At Least It Wasn't That Dastardly Hamburglar
BC2486: i had a reoccurring dream when i was a kid, that i was playing that game your dad plays when you’re a baby where he lies on his back and tosses you up a little bit and catches you, but i was playing it with the burger king king (before the awesome/creepy commericals). he then sat up really quickly like in the game “don’t wake daddy” and yelled “ahhhh” at...
Laying Pipe...and Nutsacks
Blajano: Those are the pipe’s nutsacks, what’s the problem with that?
ehaugan: The pipe has multiple internal nutsacks
Blajano: Oh absolutely. Don’t ask me what they got inside though.
FongoBongo: Probably more pipes and internal nutsacks
We're Looking For the Sex Posts As You Read This
Sehkmet: popular misconceptions about evolution: * Biological evolution does not address the origin of life; for that, see abiogenesis. The two are commonly and mistakenly conflated. Evolution describes (and through the theory of evolution, endeavors to explain) the changes in gene frequencies that occur in populations of living...
Use This Guy's Pickup Lines Verrry Carefully
Batousi: I was just curious if anyone would like to share their pickup lines they used on their wives/gf’s and are still with their wives/gf’s. Doesn’t matter if it’s in game or outside. Mine was towards my wife when we first met, “Would you like to take a ride on my motorcycle?” 2 weeks later we are living together and happily married and a baby on the way.
Only Because I Want to See His Belly Jiggle. No...
iSMELLmyDOODOObrowns: I’d like to rape that guy up the ass to watch his belly jiggle. Justinpfx: wait, what? iSMELLmyDOODOObrowns: I would like to partake in the act of rape on the guy who “stormed” the field so that I can watch his belly fat jiggle and furthermore I would like to take a crap while doing so. understand now? the fucking nerve of some people
June 2009
83 posts
Everyone Knows Peeing On Them Gets Totally Lame
TheDarksock: I peed in a horse once.
Wait. Seriously Though, Answer The Question --...
RangerDick: Fuck Wilma. Seriously, Fuck Wilma. I’d roll up on Betty and be like sup girl and betty’d be all surpriused bc i’m not barney and during that time period (honeymoon) I’d be humping her pants off.
Tell You The Truth, Beards Don't Actually Cool You...
ldfire2: Jordan (the country, not MJ LOL!) has no cities, or fire trucks, and 17 people live there. all of them have beards including the women who’d be hot without them.
Spiciness Makes My Dreams All Weird-Like
FringeBen3: I could sleep in sweet n sour sauce, as long as it wasn’t the spicy kind.
You're Right, That Is Significantly Better Than a...
CliffingtonFalls: if god came down and said to me “i will grant you one wish” my wish would be that i could rate this video a 6
I Also Know a Great Dentist
kobidobidog: Yea they should give the dog a penis. Drop your pants and let him lick it. and ejaculate and let him lick it. Dogs love semen. A dog can smell it, and they want it. Vagina’s are a thing that dogs like too. greatlife4pets is a great dog food. I have more good information.
This Isn't Your Fight, Wisconsin...
Krug23: I’m sorry but Michigan is not all that! Minnesota grilled cheeses are the bomb!!!
What Stomachs?
horry34: gimme the loot, gimme the loot. Dino69: Looting is stealing. In Africa they tie you to a tree and chop of your stomach if you loot. horry34: whatever. i’d fuck Afrca up.
Dude Will Tear Up a Hawk, Though
wndrwmyn: No one can fuk a bald eagle, I dn’t care if they r Captain America
Apparently You've Never Been Pissed Off
Alantronco: once he tried to stick that remote up his ass you gotta know its fake. who would try to stick something in their ass when their pissed off.
Not Such a Tank
Tankgrrl: today I broke down because I put my foot in mayonnaise
You Mean That Baywatch Nights Guy?
shutthefupplz: DO NOT and i repeat DO NOT HASSEL THE HOFF the hoff was not meant to be hasseld… im sorry, but this is david hasselhoff. u cant hassel him, because he is david hasselhoff i grew up with an alcoholic mother, i am 22 and my mom is still an alcoholic and i have been to rehab 5 times for drugs and alcohol…… i know how it is, so i am allowed to laugh at this, and with...
And That's Counting The Time That Boob Touched My...
Hanso: How bout we each go to our own little corner of Azeroth and just play how we want? And for the record, I play PvM (Player v Murloc) and its the most fun I’ve ever had.
But Easier To Keep Once You Do
dairymilk: fat chicks are harder to kidnap though.
Technically, Tevas Aren't Flip Flops
daprincess14: my current boyfriend of almost two years doesnt even like flip flops, and he knows i would not like him if he did.
The More You Know
itsEvanyo69: YES PEOPLE NEVER DO DRUGS….JUST get Drunk and Smoke MARIJUANA ALL DAY NIGGGGGGAAA THATS HOW I DO!!!!!!! but seriously Drugs is Crack and Harioin and all that stupid shit marijuanas not a drug!
Orange You Glad You Didn't Say Banana?
zyar: i wanna try weed cause it wont fuck me up. ill still have decent skin and teeth. i might try acid if i find it not to be too expensive and addictive but only once.
TJDynamo: once is all it takes, because one time is all it takes to have one bad trip that you’ll trip on occasionally for the rest of your life and then kill yourself because you think you’re an orange.
Science
lurnst: or we could just breed oprah with giraffes
That's What Happened to Mama Cass
Nalog: I would not accept a sandwich from a female ninja. But then, I probably wouldn’t know they were a ninja until I had eaten the sandwich they had given me….and was dying.
Nazi Germany Has Left The Group We Invented The...
abahawas: sorry, PERSONAL computers.. what you are using now.. what your life is based on is AMERICAN! good job to germany if the second reich implemented computers in their war efforts, but it was defenitly not the first computer in history.. the first computers were made before christ and used no electricity, but did compute with gears ect.. Germany is pathetic!
No Title Needed
toryfrank: LMAO! I can’t even fit a banana in my mouth, let alone a watermelon!
It's A Fine Line...
kristisking: it’s not like u shit on him. did u shit on him? bc if u shit on him then it’s fucked up but if u were just dancing, then how is Paul getting mad?
Come On Now, Zeus Didn't Raise You Like That
zero252627: Hey guys Jesus loves you and died for all your sins
HiddenFailures00: Jesus is dead, and Thor will rape your children in the womb. All glory to Valhalla!
That's Not How Email Works
dibba100: taylor is so hot in this video i wish i lived next to her so i could write messages to her
Knucklepuck!
Kristine: For some odd reason, I liked D2: The Mighty Ducks. Now, obviously, I haven’t had the opportunity to see The Might Ducks, you know, the first one? But my friend only had the second and the third, so I’m watching those first and hopefully I didn’t have to see the first one to understand the second. But I got the story just fine, not to mention, after reading the summary...
Well, Chad's Here
VestnikRA: Are there immortal people living now amongst us? Would be nice to meet one!
Titties!!!
guest: i purchased a new undergarment. And as it turns out, it is EXTREME PUSH UP, and basically launches what little breasts I have through the roof. And I like it. But then I’m all OH SHUCKS this is all a lie, because I’m actually flat and this makes me look like I’m LOADED! So I might return it. Also, I think I’ll start wrapping my chest super tight in cloth so I look...
And There's Your Afternoon
HIPHOPexclusivez: Your voice is sexy. I look forward to masturbating to this video, and reminiscing about it.
Manners
itsirkmr: Those women were laughing out of complete ignorance and lack of education (not to mention bad manners). I know I would never teach my son to mock someone else because of their unatural penis.
I'll Take Enthusiasm for $400!!!
SewCrazyDogLady: Jeopardy? How Cool!!
Hope: I know! It was huge fun - even if they never call, I’m glad I tried!!
Perspective
Zanti Agent: If i were an ant, i’d be…Ah, a sterile female.
I think I’d like to be a queen Atta cephalotes. I mean guys, let’s face reality; being a male ant has no future. The ruler of a huge fungus-growing community, on the other hand, has real promise.
Stick With What Works
SummerBunny: right now. im in so much trouble everywhere. i was supposed to have 6 months probation right. but i was at a party and we drank all the alcohol so we went on a run to get more. it was closed, we got some duster. my friend wrecked my car, it got impounded and i have court in like 20 days for the shit. i had community service. piss tests every 2 weeks which im going to fail. now they...
Correction: Floodlights
ExarchiaG7: Almost got caught dealing once and hid in someone’s backyard for two days. Not that bad though…I tend to stay out of the spotlight.
Backfire
SnowLeopard: Hey gamerz, you gaytoolls have no life u jst sit online drooling gross and playing ur games and getting fat eating cheetos shitting yourselfs its pathetic get a life and a girlfriend and ssex like the the rest of us 4 reel lmao Nutbag: ummm. u just created a username at 4 AM to come on to a World of Warcraft message brd and talk sh*t & the best name you could think of to do that...
Kill Yourself
Rance43: Anyone have advice for chiseld model w/ rockhard abs bench 340 lbs, jacked look like beckham but with better hair lol done both ragional and national campaigns and doesn’t mind nude?
But What About CNBC?
Mercer1012: Bush lied, there were no WMD’s, that man has sent 4000 US troops to their deaths for no reason. I hope he burns in hell right next to Ahmadinefag, and Hitler, and Stalin, and all the child molesters and lawyers there are. I like CNN.
And Dry Humping Doesn't Count
PelosisLove09: I’d like to lose my virginity, but you can’t just grab a girl and have sex with her. That can actually be pretty illegal.
That Wasn't Hugging
katokoch: The most hugging I saw in high school was between the kids in band. Not orchestra, not choir, no it was band. I had to wait sometimes for people to hurry their hugging up around the band lockers so I could put my horn away and leave. Thankfully, I was not enough of a band geek to be offered many hugs.
But His Disappointment Did
dpaco: sprayed deodorant on the walls at my house I was in the tagging fad haha. Dad hit me and kicked me out for a few hours.
His punches didn’t even hurt